Boy Suspended For Sporting Rayhawk

Now this is just plain stupid [emphasis mine]:

TAMPA -- The Rayhawk, a trend ever since Tampa Bay Rays players starting sporting them, has gotten a 12-year-old boy an in-school suspension.

"I was surprised. It's just a hairdo, really nothing, just a hairdo," said Zach Sharples, an honor student at Lincoln Middle in Manatee County.

Sharples said he must stay under in-school suspension until he changes the haircut or grows it out.

Boy, this must be some harido. I mean, it must be dangerous or something to cause them to suspend an honor student. What did administrators have to say?

...a representative for the school district said it is outlined in the dress code -- no distracting hairstyles.

This thing must be bright purple with sparklers in it and stand two feet high to be distracting. This is Jr. High after all. So let's take a look:

OMG!!!!!!111!!11!eleventy-one!1 I can't concentrate! My synapses are failing! Must...not...look...at...hair...

Seriously? Distracting? WTF?!?

Actually, come to think of it, this is bringing back memories. When I was in elementary school, oh, about 25 years ago, a kid dared to come to school with a mohawk. The uproar was incredible. We couldn't stop talking about it. For about a day. After that, it was like, meh. Administrators flipped out then too. Forced the kid to wear a hood till it grew out. It's nice to know we've made such advancements in 25 years.

I just thought of something else for administrators to ban at the school: Marines! I mean, how different is that mohawk from a Marine's "high and tight"?Sad, sad, sad. I can't believe our armed forces are allowing such distractions. What if there's a war? Our soldiers might be gawking at hairdos rather than killing the enemy. We need to get these brave school administrators and put them in the Marines to combat this kind of distraction. Our troops deserve the best.

I don't have to worry about hairstyles. This is what happened to me after reading the article:

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